I have other posts pending but this one seemed more important right now.
I tend to be a 'stress merchant.'
Many years ago I told my minister that I function best when under stress. I work best when on the last minute to deadline. I always enjoyed the pressure that made me get going and leave procrastination behind. I liked having so many things on my plate that I had to stay on focus to get things done. I liked lists and being able to tick stuff off one after the other. I liked challenges.
Roll through the years and suddenly it seemed stress became my enemy. My body refused to co-operate with my mind and there was a major breakdown. Many things contributed. In three short years my father, brother, mother-in-law, a young aunt and my grandmother died, Cancer being the cause. I became pregnant with our fourth child, our family business was failing and we were in a difficult financial position. Many other 'smaller' things, part of life in general, were going on. I suddenly found I was unable to function as I was used to. After several years a doctor who looked at things differently diagnosed me with ME or Myalgic Encephalomyelitis. They were tough years. I was mostly a Zombie. Slowly I recovered with great determination, more rest than I wanted, gradually increasing my movement and activity levels and trying out a Stone Age diet. If the Wheat Belly book had been around then I might have shortened my recovery period to a single year instead of 5 or 6 years with a continuing need to monitor my activities and pace myself.
Roll on a few more years and other seriously stressful situations entered our lives. I ate, especially bread and cake, to cover my stress and pain. The exact opposite of what is helpful. I learned that you can deplete your adrenals or end up with adrenal fatigue but I had no answers as to how to reverse this. By this time I was a 'Born Again Christian,' with a powerful faith. Traumatic memories, emotional and spiritual and even some physical healings began. I found worship, music and dance and the joy that comes with this kind of fellowship extremely helpful. I also found that the best meetings, the ones I enjoyed the most, left me drained and exhausted for days. I did not think this was right but had no answers.
Over the years I went from a normal weight to extremely fat in spite of all my efforts to eat and live a healthy life. I searched and learned and finally discovered the value of a low carb diet. More recently I found that wheat is not my friend and that certain fats, such as animal fats and coconut oil, are my friends. A huge learning curve began to take place in my understanding of how our bodies crave a certain type of nutrition. I lost weight quickly before going into what feels like a seventeen month plateau. My weight loss has not completely stalled but it is beginning to feel as though I might have to be satisfied with where I am. That's not what I want. I am not at a weight which is optimally healthy for me.
I am not willing to stop here. I began to ask why but there were no answers until perhaps today when I watched this video.
There are so many things going on in our lives which cause stress. I do not know anyone who is facing as much as we are at this time. It's not helpful nor wise to go into detail here but believe me I am not exaggerating. I know there are people who face worse stuff than us but I don't know how they manage their lives. My concern is how do I manage better and how do I handle my stress level so that it no longer hinders weight loss and my pleasure in living?
Perhaps this video tells the story. Stop being afraid of stress and embrace it. I guess to some extent I have learned to do this or I would not be here now. I have more to learn, attitudes to change and more personal growth to experience.
Fear is a destroyer of life. Perfect love casts out all fear. Surely if I can find the strength to adjust my attitude to all the stressors in my life I will be a winner. The truth sets us free. This looks like truth to me.